Thursday, November 15, 2007

Camp-N-Ride, part II



So...back to the story. Bert, Ryan and Kristine showed up with the TOMAC CARBIDE frames. The back of Bert's truck was abuzz with activity and anticipation. The first was Bert's XL. The second was a what??? A large. What did Bob need? A Medium. After an hour, the laughter began to subside. It's always funny when someone (other than me) gets the shit end of the stick. That is being remedied as we speak, but it was still frikkin hilarious.









Soon after that, the Park Gestapo rolled up (THREE of them) and began to congregate. The tiny-bitty one spoke first. Sounding like one of the "Chipmunks" singing a Christmas song, he squeeked up and asked to see everyone's reservations. Thing is, they don't take reservations by the site, they are all first come first served. They also sold two of our group (online) sites with hook-ups for their trailers...but they don't HAVE hook-ups. I had arrived at 7:30am Friday morning, HOURS in advance of anyone else, to claim the four sites we needed. All was fine, until late Friday night when Randy and Kim rolled in, expecting a large site w/hookups. After realizing THEIR mistake, Randy almost killed the park-kiosk kid. In an effort to save his own life, the kid gave Randy one extra site (#26) to be able to park his trailer an truck. Done.....right?









Not so much....here's the story of the smallest cop ever. He said something, and as I looked through the night air at a normal man's height, I was confused, for I saw no one. It was not until Roger tapped me on the shoulder and directed my gaze down towards my ankle that I was able to make him out in the dark night air. I ran back to camp, grabbed a box, and asked him to stand on it so we could talk. Taking his tiny little hand and helping him up on the box (careful not to crush the juice box in his Lilliputian grasp) he began to speak again. He was apparently confused as to why we had five spots instead of four, and wanted us to clear out one of our camp-sites. After explaining to this fetus of a man-child that we had been sold 2 hook-up sites, and that I had reserved the four original sites at 7:30am (again, 1st come, 1st served..that means I win, you lose) he was s**t out of luck, he was agitated. It was like when his mommy witheld the toy from his Fruit Loops in the morning. Roger saw the situation deteriorating quickly, and fearing that the Park Officer would likely be beaten with his own gun, or even possibly EATEN alive by me, he stepped up and offered to move a car from a spot, directly in the center of camp.
We did this, and waited for the poor people who would then be squatting in the center of our 40-plus person band of rejects. We waited all night. We woke up, and waited some more. No one came. I strolled through the campground, and many other sites were still vacant as well. We went through an hour of midget hell for nothing. This is why nobody likes tiny people...they get some authority and forget that they are still tiny..then they get the hell beaten out of them.









Roger was pretty pissed in the morning when nobody was in that spot, and probably was wishing he'd have let me eat that little fella. Breakfast was great, thanks to Kim. She made some modified Chilaquilles plate with potatoes, sausage and eggs. It was so good, and my size -1 Gap kids wearin' woman ate herself into a Dress Barn size 62. Now we can share clothes! The morning ride was fun on Sunday, and Lydia, Abel, Betsy and I ran up the canyon. Lyd really loved her NINER RIP 9 in a medium. We cruised up to the top of upper-Sin Nombre, and flew down the hill with reckless abandon. Betsy was very nice and helpful to Lyd. I understand the awkwardness of the situation to a few of you, having to meet someone new with me. I wanted to say a very real and serious thanks to Valerie, Karl, Betsy and Tim for the hospitality shown to Lyd. She genuinely felt like you guys all had been friends forever. It was super funny to see Lydia trying to follow abel through the singletrack. Abel was BOMBING the DH, and Lyd was just following him with all the trust in the world. That proved funny a few times, as she exploded out the bak of a couple of turns! She did manage to take a few burms, jumps and drops that I never thought would be attempted, and I'm afraid she's hooked now.









We all returned to camp by noon or so, and began to pack it up. Roger and James had the unfortunate task of driving to the Valley and returning the demo bikes, and Abel drove us to Julie Kuhnle's house in Burbank. It was a beautiful night, so after a short relaxing hour or two, we walked the couple of miles to Burbank's entertainment district for dinner at the old eam hangout, B.J.'s Pizza.
We awoke to the alarm at 6a.m. Monday morning, went to the airport, and winged home on my new favorite airline, SKYBUS. Thanks to everyone for EVERYTHING, it was really nice to see you all again. We'll be back soon for good, and may be back sooner for Christmas at my Mom's house in Riverside! Jingle my bells, ya'll...

1 Comments:

At 2:10 PM, Blogger timari said...

Don't you mean "jingle my balls"?????????????

 

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