"Body Wash"
ALLRIGHT
THAT'S IT
I HAVE HAD IT.
That's it...Al Qaieda has won. How are supposed to be a Superpower when all of the men in this country are wearing $300 dollar blue jeans (pre-stressed, even)and buying "body wash" and an "exfoliating loofah." ALL my jeans have holes in them, but they were earned with sweat equity in the backcountry. I remember when WOMEN didn't shave their privates...now we are in a time of lab-rat-shaven MEN who buy BODY WASH? I am bombarded daily with television ads that are pushing product some ladies would feel "girlie" buying...and they are marketing it to MEN? Scary...
What's next? Will Jimmy Chu design a line of "Ryan Seacrest" Signature Series Pumps for men? I'd rather die. Imported Marine Iguana loafers don't have toe spikes and SPD compatability. Can't use 'em. Body wash has nothing on a cold dip in Navajo lake after a long day at elevation rocking the Mormon sinletrack.
Leave the body wash for Rue Paul and Liberace...and maybe Siegfried and Roy
....yeah, they can have body wash.
posted by Sharpie @ September 17, 2008
1 comments
1 Comments:
DON'T BE AFRAID of body wash. It's just liquid soap. Yes, they should just call it liquid soap, but they've got a team of pretentious ad guys that have to call it something "hip". Just be glad it's not called "Xtreme Torso Cleaning Fluid!"
DO BE AFRAID of men getting pedicures, wearing pink shirts, sporting J-Lo glasses, and going to the salon to get their hair done like Sanjaya.
Plus, say you're at the gym, you won't drop a bottle of body wash like you would a slippery bar of soap and have to worry about getting accosted by that guy Bubba who just got parolled from Folsum.
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