Annual Iran/Israel Mountain Bike Race Update

article courtesy Tete de Merde news agency




The annual Iran/Israel Mountain Bike Race was held last weekend in Tehran. The venue was seemingly new, and looked much like a ballistic missile launch facility for nuclear tipped weapons. When asked, Iran's Interior Minister said it was not a weapons launch site. He explained it to be a new prototype for an ice fishing complex. Hans Blix from the United Nations said his satellite imagery confirmed it was indeed an ice fishing arena under construction.






This was an American tourist who came to watch the race! This was a traditional eyecovering for female Western bike enthusiasts, I guess.









The Israeli's were a two to one favorite for this epic race. They were seen training through the streets of Palestinian controlled Gaza wearing custom sublimated jerseys that read "We took you'r land...and it's really nice." Only four were killed during training, leaving the fastest eleven left for the big race. The Iranian team was not expected to do well, after having spent many months NOT fighting across the border in Iraq.
After the gun went off..and the RPG, and the IED, and the WMD, and some girl's IUD..the race was on! After a couple of hours, when the Uranium-234 enriched dust had cleared, the Israeli's were once again victorious.



Iranian President Ahmedinejad first denied the race ever happened, then was quick to blame the Jews for their loss.